I'm loath to use my personal life to promote what I do, but at the same time, I don't like a journalist going away with no more than you could get off Wikipedia, where most of it's invented anyway.

There's a domino effect with certain things you say.

I'm getting positive feedback for my acting so we'll see if any other interesting parts come up.

It is easy for me to love myself, but for ladies to do it is another question altogether.

We had a week off in the middle of shooting, but as soon as everyone stopped, we all went down with six different types of flu and other unmentionable diseases.

With stand-up you've just got that one chance. Audiences can be quite fickle.

My forte is playing drunks down the ages. When my agent rings me about a role, I don't ask what the part is, but what century it's in.

I used to be good with kids, but as I get older, I'm grumpy and terrible with them. As for doing a gig at a 6-year old's birthday party, you couldn't pay me enough.

When I wasn't as attractive as I am now, I suffered at the hands of cruel children and their taunts until I realised that confidence and a bit of aesthetic care can overcome that.

I love the way my weight fluctuates in the newspapers. It was 18 stone and then people look at a bad picture of me and add a few more stone on. I think the highest was 22 stone.

They look outside the windows of their apartment in town and realize they're not living in a terrace anymore. This is a room full of dreamers who like to go to London for a day.

A word is a word is another word more beautiful because of the former and the next and the circle and sun they create.

Comedy, of course, lives for serious moments.

The teachings of elegant sayings Should be collected when one can. For the supreme gift of words of wisdom, Any price will be paid.

Faith, it is evident, may be relied on to produce sustained action and, more rarely, sustained contemplation.

The cost for the recipient of God’s grace is nothing, and no price could be higher for arrogant people to pay.

If there were a people consisting of gods, they would be governed democratically. So perfect a government is not suitable to men.

Pebble is a piece of sacred ground. They say it's the greatest meeting of land and water in the world. This course was heaven designed - just the way it fits on the land.

She is our moon. Our tidal pull. She is the rich deep beneath the sea, the buried treasure, the expression in the owl's eye, the perfume in the wild rose. She is what the water says when it moves.

In Latin America, women are supposed to be voluptuous. They don't believe that you have to be skinny to be attractive.

Most people enjoy the sight of their own handwriting as they enjoy the smell of their own farts.