I'm not Hollywood. I'm a Quarter Rat. I belong here.

Neckties satisfy modern man's desire to dress in art.

The biggest challenge in New Orleans has been to find workers who can climb a ladder after lunch.

Every fool knows you can't touch the stars, but it doesn't stop a wise man from trying.

Old muleskinners told how the mules were waiting at the shaft when they arrived each morning. They wanted relief from the heat, deerflies and mosquitoes just like the men.

But I'm very thankful that no one is slamming my head against the wall anymore.

I am richer than Davy Crockett. I can settle back and do what I want to do. And what I want to do is card tricks and magic.

Your son is heir to an enormous fortune and name. Someone would be bound to bid for you him and take him as his ward.

To some people, I may seem calm. But if you could peer beneath the surface, you would see that I'm like a duck--paddling, paddling, paddling.

Even a baby can write a poem. It doesn't guarantee the sale.

I'm really good at gymnastics, and that's about it.

Time is an abstraction which, on earth, exists only for the human brain it has evolved.

I was a little bit chubby when I was a kid.

We must demand more not from each other, but more from ourselves

When I can't sleep, I'll start thinking about how many shows I've done, count up the number of television shows and movies.

I look like a real bag lady when I go to Starbucks with my dog and get my chai.

Excitable boy, they all said, he killed and raped her and brought her home.