I'm not a big reality show fan, because I just think it's too fake.

I came back to New York after college like any number of struggling performers, and you just find that niche where you can have some sort of impact. And for me that turned out to be comedy.

I can tell when somebody recognizes me, and I try to avoid those people.

I have a medical condition, all right. It's called caring too much, and it's incurable. Also, I have eczema.

For some reasons, I have WWE wrestlers tweeting me all the time. Like, my biggest fans. Why they can connect with my love for Meryl Streep, I don't know.

If you really think you have something good, you can't take no for an answer. You've got to get in there and ignore the people who say no.

My father and I were really like a team. I mean, he was very supportive. He'd come to every single one of my live shows.

I've had a lot of arguments with people, but it's never really gotten physical.

Hotmail just picked up 12 new episodes of 'Judging Amy'.

Difficult People? I don't really know. I don't have those metrics.

I'm not much of a dancer.

To remember is to disengage from the present.

Each time I write, I reaffirm my soul.

I had a dream about you last night, you were the same piece of S**t I know and hate in real life.

Television is fun, but it's hard, and if it gets too crazy I may just do it as a part-time thing.

Be wary of technology; it is often merely an improved means to an unimproved end.

Gwyneth Paltrow -- she always looks like she's about to cry. I wish someone would just kick her and get it over with. But I loved her in The Royal Tenenbaums.

Vagueness and procrastination are ever a comfort to the frail in spirit.

She went kind of pink and laughed, the kind of laugh you do when you know yo shouldn't be laughing. The kind of laugh that spoke of a conspiracy.

We all have a dark place in us. It's what we do with it and the choice we make.

Normally when I'm writing, in the beginning I don't think of lyrics at all. I'm just improvising.