I'm not a fighter, I'm a bleeder.

People will kill you over time, and how they'll kill you is with tiny, harmless phrases, like 'be realistic.'

Money can't buy you love, but it can get you some really good chocolate ginger biscuits.

Black Books adheres to a more old fashioned, traditional sitcom format, which I think works, because in its own way, it's quite theatrical.

You’re not an adult at all - you're just a tall child holding a beer, having conversations you don't understand...

Don't do it! Stay away from your potential. You'll mess it up, it's potential, leave it. Anyway, it's like your bank balance - you always have a lot less than you think.

I'm quite a compulsive person-I only worked this out recently - I'm compulsive, but I'm also very indecisive. I don't know what I want, but I know that I want it now.

Oh how I hate you. I hate you so much it gives me energy. I have to get up early in the morning just to hate you, because there's not enough time in the day! Please GO AWAY!

I don't do drugs. If I want a rush I just stand up when I'm not expecting it.

I think you should, yeah. You should wash your beard, then shave it off, nail it to a Frisbee and fling it over a rainbow.

You try various things when you're growing up. I was an attache in the Foreign Service for a while and then I drove a bulldozer, but neither of those panned out for me so it had to be stand-up.

Choose the Path to Enlightenment over the path of least resistance

I confused things with their names: that is belief.

Learn your topic through self-study through scrupulous analysis and learn about your goal

I traced the cord back to the wall, no wonder it was never plugged in at all.

It struck me that our history is contained in the home we live in, that we are shaped by the ability of these simple structures to resist being defiled

Because way down deep they know that civilized people have to preserve rare birds.

Why do people think being with someone is the answer to everything?

Marriage - as well as erotic friendships and sexual liaisons -between members of contrasting races and religions will take place with greater frequency, and will be more accepted than it is today.

I am committed to strengthening our agricultural economy by protecting the unique interests of small and medium size family farms so that they can continue to operate.

Boxing is so loose and flowy, and martial arts is more stiff, and about strength and structure.