I'm not childless, darling. I am childfree.

I think the Republican party should be placed in drydock and have the barnacles scraped off its bottom.

It's the good girls who keep diaries; the bad girls never have the time.

I have three phobias which, could I mute them, would make my life as slick as a sonnet, but as dull as ditch water: I hate to go to bed, I hate to get up, and I hate to be alone.

Only good girls keep diaries. Bad girls don't have time.

If I had to live my life again, I'd make the same mistakes, only sooner.

Too many of our countrymen rejoice in stupidity, look upon ignorance as a badge of honor. They condemn everything they don't understand.

All my life I've been terrible at remembering people's names. I once introduced a friend of mine as Martini. Her name was actually Olive.

Fill what is empty, empty what is full, and scratch where it itches.

My father warned me about men and booze but he never said anything about women and cocaine.

They aren't making mirrors like they use to.

If there’s one thing I learned in Alanon, it’s that you got to face the music because it just grows louder when you ignore it.

The word "elegance" is a bit different now.

Men are good but women are magic.

No one nor anything can silence me.

We do have a saying in America: if you're in a hole, stop digging ..... erm, I'm not sure I should have said that.

I'm really lucky because my mom is a good beauty muse.

I was always intensely Romantic, even when I was too young to understand what that meant.

A hundred children, a hundred individuals who are people--not people-to-be, not people of tomorrow, but people now, right now--today.

The ultimate aim of psychoanalysis is to attribute art to mental weakness, and then to trace the weakness back to the point where, according to analytic dogma, it originated namely, the lavatory.

Friendship is an opportunity to act on God's behalf in the lives of the people that we're close to, reminding each other who God is.