I'm not going to assume liberals are stupid, as they do with conservatives. No, I'll attribute it instead to more fraud and deceit.

If Thomas Jefferson thought taxation without representation was bad, he should see how it is with representation.

Poverty is not the root cause of crime.

Liberals attempt through judicial activism what they cannot win at the ballot box.

We're not sexists, we're chauvinists - we're male chauvinist pigs, and we're happy to be because we think that's what men were destined to be. We think that's what women want.

End results that work that don’t involve government threaten liberals.

You know why there's a Second Amendment? In case the government fails to follow the first one.

Styrofoam and plastic milk jugs are biodegradable! Do you know what isn't biodegradable? Paper!

I think cigars are just a tremendous addition to the enjoyment of life.

The NAACP should have riot rehearsal. They should get a liquor store and practice robberies.

In a country of children where the option is Santa Claus or work, what wins?

Most of the psychological differences between men and women seem to come from differences in their reproductive system

When two people decide to get a divorce it isn't a sign that they "don't understand" one another but a sign that they have at last begun to.

Music is given to us with the sole purpose of establishing an order in things, including, and particularly, the coordination between man and time.

We live in a time where government is not a leadership thing, it's more a business that's out there and running riot, so I guess the people have to go out there and say stuff.

I choose what I believe, and say nothing. For I am not as simple as I may seem.

I know some lonely houses off the road A robber'd like the look of,-- Wooden barred, And windows hanging low

I love sleeping. If there was an Olympics for it, I'd take gold. I'm Cuban. We love to sleep.

If the party of gloom is ever to regain its footing, it will have to start by understanding that those who defeated them are not a bunch of ignorant yahoos looking forward to Armageddon.

Mistakes are the price of an interesting life.

Too many words are lit for a beast of burden.