I'm pretty happy. I obviously have complaints about things, but for the most part, I'm on the above-average side of happy people.

I love doing stuff with Todd Barry and Jon Benjamin. We give the stage to good bands and funny people.

Occasionally I'll watch Fox News for as long as I can tolerate it, or CNN. I'll watch until I get infuriated, but you got to know what they're talking about and what they're not talking about.

I like pot, I enjoy pot, I like to smoke it. But, the one thing I don't like about pot is the subculture it's spawned. I think it's embarrassing and really juvenile and uncreative

You cannot win a War on Terrorism. It's like having a war on jealousy.

Sketches have characters, exits, entrances and are vastly different.

We should just get somebody from the left and the right and they should all throw bumper stickers at each other and the first one to cover the other one wins.

I hate bumper stickers, you can't sum anything up. All you do is paint yourself in some caricaturist corner.

The Bible is the funniest book I have ever read. It's so funny! Right in the first six pages, it's funny!

The South has more of a disproportionate amount of irony on T-shirts than any other region in the country.

I went to a bunch of marches in New York and Washington, and you know I believe in the cause, but to march with those people takes a lot of compromise on my end.

Tell me whom you haunt and I’ll tell you who you are.

I've tried word processors, but I think I'm too old a dog to use one.

The cruelest lies are often told without a word The kindest truths are often spoken, never heard

By his provocations to good-natured merriment, a humorist of the first water contributes as much to the sum of happiness as the gravest philosopher.

If the past decade was the decade of searching and finding and looking for stuff, this coming decade is going to be the decade of filtering and going to your friends for recommendations.

There are very few instances where writers have also been effective image makers - different skill sets are required.

Passion is like the lightning, it is beautiful, and it links the earth to heaven, but alas it blinds!

It is not theatre that is indispensable, but something quite different. To cross the frontiers between you and me.

Seek freedom within action.

I never knew I was an artist until I did 'Last of the Mohicans'.