I'm really going to do my homework. I'm going to be down there on the practice tee finding out if a guy's wife beat him up the night before, important stuff like that. Stuff that people want to know.

My swing is so bad I look like a caveman killing his lunch.

Pressure is playing for ten dollars when you don't have a dime in your pocket.

Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of a bagpipe.

You can make a lot of money in this game. Just ask my ex-wives. Both of them are so rich that neither of their husbands work.

I'm going to win so much money this year, my caddie will make the top twenty money-winners list.

The older I get, the better I used to be.

You're Mexican until you make money and then you're Spanish.

I'm not saying my golf game went bad, but if I grew tomatoes, they'd come up sliced.

If you are caught on a golf course during a storm and are afraid of lightning, hold up a 1-iron. Not even God can hit a 1-iron.

There are two things you can do with your head down - play golf and pray.

The more varied the environments in which you exercise your leadership gift, the stronger that gift will become. You will become a far more effective leader.

There's plenty of room for finger-pointing for the debacle in Iraq. If it's a problem that the Iraqi military is broken at its core, then there's no point in sending more Humvees and Apaches.

Those who kept silent yesterday will remain silent tomorrow.

Being a conservative on campus is like bing a goat amongst the taliban. You are never safe.

I feel like I'm really lucky.

Successful hedge funds will be entrepreneurial; it is the essence of the craft.

God is not afraid of new things.

You can heal your body with food.

Moderation is actually the flip side of dieting, that is, imposed deprivation.