I’m so tired... I was up all night trying to round off infinity.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

I don’t know what it means to live.

Whatever belief that doesn't make you happier, stronger, healthier or wiser, surely doesn't deserve to be sheltered in your mind.

Helplessness is unquestionably the first and the surest indication of a praying heart. ... Prayer and helplessness are inseparable. Only he who is helpless can truly pray.

Always have a plan and believe in it. I tell my coaches not to compromise. Nothing good happens by accident.

Justification for infidelity and dishonesty in all their manifestations lies in the marginal cost economics of “just this once.

A college degree does not lessen the length of your ears; it only conceals it.

I say let Matteo Renzi work. He took over a country that was in disarray, not florid. And not the other way around.

Very few men acquire wealth in such a manner as to receive pleasure from it.

My wife said I look like a Latin American dictator. I said, 'That's what I am'

Public space can be a lot better with some private space to contradict it and vice versa. It keeps the system alive. If the system is just one thing, then it's closed and it eventually dies.