I'm tired of all this nonsense about beauty being skin deep. That's deep enough. What do you want, an adorable pancreas?

A lawyer is never entirely comfortable with a friendly divorce, anymore than a good mortician wants to finish his job and then have the patient sit up on the table.

Being divorced is like being hit by a Mack truck. If you live through it, you start looking very carefully to the right and to the left.

The real menace in dealing with a five-year-old is that in no time at all you begin to sound like a five-year-old.

If you can keep your head when all about you are losing theirs, it's just possible you haven't grasped the situation.

I was always the last woman on the last down elevator as the store was closing.

Marrying a man is like buying something you've been admiring for a long time in a shop window. You may love it when you get it home, but it doesn't always go with everything else in the house.

Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?

I feel about airplanes the way I feel about diets. It seems to me that they are wonderful things for other people to go on.

Some enterprising youth should go from door to door on Christmas morning peddling batteries.

When the grandmothers of today hear the word 'Chippendales,' they don't necessarily think of chairs.

When a person is loved, they are granted the strength of all seas.

Lost: Heartbeat. Last seen being chased away by an Irishman’s shameless grin. Reward if returned.

A WATERY BLISSAs busy as an ice cream freezer, On a Sunday getting hotter, Happy is the honey eater-The busy ocean otter, Floating alongside Teter, On a sea full of water.

The day time will stop moving, had I known and fulfillment will be the clock hands that will show many people the hour that passed and moment in which they are.

Men, for the most part, like to pursue women. We like not knowing if we can catch you. We feel rewarded when we do. Especially when the chase is a long one.

In science we must be interested in things, not in persons.

Ferrari leads, McLaren second, McLaren second, Jordan third, and Benneton fifth and sixth.

You’re not seriously going out again, are you?” “Seriously, yeah. Bowling. Her name’s Laura. If you want more details, you’re gonna have to download the video like everybody else.

The world should be worried about those who go around the planet with a can of gasoline in one hand and a box of matches in the other, pretending to sell fire insurance.

Wealth has more and more increased, and at the same time gathered itself more and more into masses, strangely altering the old relations, and increasing the distance between the rich and the poor.