I'm used to seeing it, but it's weird having an Academy Award. You usually only see one of them on the TV show when they give them out, so it's kind of surreal to have one in your house.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

Gone out. Backson. Busy backson.

I'm not opposed to comics on the Internet. It's just not interesting to me.

My fiction is only just over the horizon. I present a world that's different but it's familiar enough that it freaks people out a little.

The work part of a relationship is keeping it where you want it.

It was psychological trick called empathic listening. You say what the person is feeling so they feel understood.

I was a product of the times, the war, the occupation, the reoccupation, my 4 years in Britain, admiring but at the same time questioning whether they are able to do a better job than we can.

One must be a little foolish if one does not want to be even more stupid.

Hope is the consolation of the world.

This was the Darker Life, where every truth was written backward.

Praise Allah, for by praise His blessings multiply.