I'm very drawn to Eastern Europe, so I like a Hungarian writer who wrote in French called Emil Cioran; he was always good for giving me such a stir.

People will kill you over time, and how they'll kill you is with tiny, harmless phrases, like 'be realistic.'

Money can't buy you love, but it can get you some really good chocolate ginger biscuits.

Black Books adheres to a more old fashioned, traditional sitcom format, which I think works, because in its own way, it's quite theatrical.

You’re not an adult at all - you're just a tall child holding a beer, having conversations you don't understand...

Don't do it! Stay away from your potential. You'll mess it up, it's potential, leave it. Anyway, it's like your bank balance - you always have a lot less than you think.

I'm quite a compulsive person-I only worked this out recently - I'm compulsive, but I'm also very indecisive. I don't know what I want, but I know that I want it now.

Oh how I hate you. I hate you so much it gives me energy. I have to get up early in the morning just to hate you, because there's not enough time in the day! Please GO AWAY!

I don't do drugs. If I want a rush I just stand up when I'm not expecting it.

I think you should, yeah. You should wash your beard, then shave it off, nail it to a Frisbee and fling it over a rainbow.

You try various things when you're growing up. I was an attache in the Foreign Service for a while and then I drove a bulldozer, but neither of those panned out for me so it had to be stand-up.

And didn't time always slow, anyway, the closer you came to what you wanted?

There are some people whose turbulent waves of behaviors will drown you no matter how well you think you can swim.

The story goes as the line follow... alone... loony.......That's what's happening... now you are in a place where you can find nobody.

I am not sure just what the unpardonable sin is, but I believe it is a disposition to evade the payment of small bills.

Though no one had been buried here for almost thirty years, the grass was mown by yours truly. I felt a tidy graveyard made a happy graveyard.

A society that gives to one class all the opportunities for leisure, and to another all the burdens of work, dooms both classes to spiritual sterility.

I feel so grateful when I see a movie and there's a woman who looks somewhat like me. I'm like, 'Thank you, Samantha Morton!' You know, a woman who feels like a human being. That means so much to me.

I guess I just have bigger ovaries.

That's the curse of the reading class. We can be seduced by a good story even at the most inopportune moments.

I consider it to be the meaning of my whole life and my obligation to serve my fatherland and our people.