I make fun of situations and try and find the humor in things, but it's never at the expense of the other guy.

I knew when my career was over. In 1965 my baseball card came out with no picture.

People don't know this, but I helped the Cardinals win the pennant. I came down with hepatitis. The trainer injected me with it!

I signed a very modest $3,000 bonus with the Braves in Milwaukee. And my old man didn't have that kinda money to put out.

They broke it to me gently. The manager came up to me before a game and told me they didn't allow visitors in the clubhouse.

Between me and my roommate, we've hit 400 Major League home runs.

The highlight of my baseball career came in Philadelphia's Connie Mack Stadium when I saw a fan fall out of the upper deck. When he got up and walked away, the crowd booed.

I led the league in go get 'em next time.

In 1962 I was named Minor League Player of the Year. It was my second season in the bigs.

When I came up to bat with three men on and two outs in the ninth, I looked in the other team's dugout and they were already in street clothes.

When I played baseball I got death threats all the time--from my mother.

The sage is still not because he takes stillness to be good and therefore is still. The ten thousand things are insufficient to distract his mind - that is the reason he is still.

The act of speaking our intentions aloud shifts them from wishful thinking into action.

People who want to understand democracy should spend less time in the library with Aristotle and more time on the buses and in the subway.

The Italians are very strong defensively. They showed in Euro 2000 how good defensively they are.

William Packard surely must be one of the great editors of our time.

What are we doing down here? We prepare the blossoms of tomorrow. We all manure future humanity.

How long is a girl a child? She is a child, and then one morning you wake up she's a woman, and a dozen different people of whom you recognize none.

I hate shaving. It's much easier to just do a little stubble, but my wife and daughter like it when I'm clean-shaven. If you see me with a clean face, then you know I'm in the kissing mode!

God must love art because most of the Bible is expressed in the form of story or poetry.

He that condescended so far, and stooped so low, to invite and bring us to heaven, will not refuse us a gracious reception there.