I meet people at book signings. My record now, for signing, is ten and a half hours in one sitting.

The Greeks had invented democracy, built the Acropolis and called it a day.

Real love amounts to withholding the truth, even when you're offered the perfect opportunity to hurt someone's feelings.

A zoo is a good place to make a spectacle of yourself, as the people around you have creepier, more photogenic things to look at.

There seemed to be some correlation between devotion to God and a misguided zeal for marshmallows.

All of us take pride and pleasure in the fact that we are unique, but I'm afraid that when all is said and done the police are right: it all comes down to fingerprints.

Remember that the most important thing is to try and love other people as much as they love you.

Everyone looks retarded once you set your mind to it.

I started writing when I was twenty, and my first book came out seventeen years later.

Like all of my friends, she's a lousy judge of character.

A good [short story] would take me out of myself and then stuff me back in, outsized, now, and uneasy with the fit.

I am a storyteller and experience the bliss of writing.

The sperm donor that impregnated my mother (with me), passed away. Please, stop sending me private messages of condolences. I never met the man.

Some days I really love being a mom, and some days I don't! It's crazy - I'm tired of packing lunches!

Believe me, I don't like being photographed. I don't like myself in pictures. Actually, I do sometimes.

We're going to make great trade deals.

The days are gone forever when our enemies could blackmail us with nuclear bombs.

The world makes room for passionate people.

Those who live in the past are cowards and losers.

Survival in any meaningful sense is the key issue of our time

The essence of patriotism lies in a willingness to sacrifice for one's country, just as true greatness finds expression, not in blessings enjoyed, but in good bestowed.