I never make my mind up about anything at all, until it's over and done with.

We're born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion for the moment that we're not alone.

Ask not what you can do for your country. Ask what's for lunch.

Create your own visual style... let it be unique for yourself and yet identifiable for others.

Race hate isn't human nature; race hate is the abandonment of human nature.

Popularity should be no scale for the election of politicians. If it would depend on popularity, Donald Duck and The Muppets would take seats in senate.

My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people.

The essential is to excite the spectators. If that means playing Hamlet on a flying trapeze or in an aquarium, you do it.

If there hadn't been women we'd still be squatting in a cave eating raw meat, because we made civilization in order to impress our girlfriends.

If you want a happy ending, that depends, of course, on where you stop your story.

Personally, I don't like a girlfriend to have a husband. If she'll fool her husband, I figure she'll fool me.

Because When you write about people, you inevitably offend--but if you write about animals, the evil do not recognize themselves but the good understand immediately.

Even our tears of repentance need to be washed in the blood of the Lamb.

The fellow that has no money is poor. The fellow that has nothing but money is poorer still.

Traveling through space is stupifyingly monotonous.

Don't seek to have events happen as you wish, but wish them to happen as they do happen, and all will be well with you.

Art shows us how to see things that are constructive and good, and to be an active part of that.

In school nativity plays I was always the bloody little donkey, I was never Mary.

I want people to know that blood tests alone won't always detect thyroid disease. My blood panels were normal. I think a lot more people have this disease than are diagnosed.

I'm worried he's going to ... do something crazy." "He lives in a hole in the ground, dresses funny, and occasionally eats his assistants," Eve said. "Define crazy.

You'll never get mixed up if you simply tell the truth. Then you don't have to remember what you have said, and you never forget what you have said.