I now accept that it is looking increasingly likely that Tiger Woods is, in fact, straight.

You don't need a Harvard MBA to know that the bedroom and the boardroom are just two sides of the same ballgame.

You are who you are when nobody's watching.

As I say I don't want to kill myself, I just wouldn't mind dying.

Estate agents: like them or loathe them, you'd be mad not to loathe them.

The only reason people do not know much is because they do not care to know. They are incurious. Incuriousity is the oddest and most foolish failing there is.

People who can change and change again are so much more reliable and happier than those who can’t

Love in all eight tones and all five semitones of the word's full octave.

Wine can be a better teacher than ink, and banter is often better than books

Nothing in this world is at it seems. Except, possibly, porridge.

All the big words -virtue, justice, truth, ...- are dwarfed by the greatness of kindness

The Only Way Out Is To DIE!!!!

Your name may be 'writ in water', but for now, you have the great advantage of being a wave that can think.

You become more attractive when you love yourself. You ATTRACT the right things when you have a sense of who you are.

That amenity which the French have developed into a great art . . . conversation.

One bad programmer can easily create two new jobs a year.

My plays are made up of long monologues, which is similar to prose working with the language

The beating on the tail of the snake may stop his progress a little, but the more vital parts must be struck before his poisonous death-dealing venom will be wiped out.

Fashion is for us to have fun.

There is another kind of altruism that seems to go beyond that, a kind of super-altruism, which humans appear to have. And I think that does need a Darwinian explanation.

It's like the Wild West, the Internet. There are no rules.