I once wore a peekaboo blouse. People would peek and then they’d boo.

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.

If you don't have wrinkles, you haven't laughed enough.

Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

I've tried Buddhism, Scientology, Numerology, Transcendental Meditation, Qabbala, t'ai chi, feng shui and Deepak Chopra but I find straight gin works best.

Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.

Be very, very careful what you put in that head, because you will never, ever get it out.

Government should protect people and regulate corporations, not protect corporations and regulate people.

Hewas beautiful. I know, it’s not the manliest way to describe a guy, but inmy head, it was the adjective I used most often and it fit him to a tee.

Our goal as parents should be to endeavor to pass down our faith to the next generation in such a way that they will be able to pass down their faith to the following generation in our absence.

Life, is energy. It is the energy that makes your heart beat and makes you breathe, that causes the cells of your body to automatically grow and reproduce the moment you are conceived!

We don't get what we deserve. We get what we BELIEVE we deserve.

I can't think of anything when I'm depressed. I just want to be alone.

If someone asks me where I bought something I’m wearing, I will usually say I don’t remember.

I think you should only wear jewellery if it has a story behind it.

Thoughts are to the Desires as Scouts and Spies, to range abroad, and find the way to the things Desired.