I pay taxes in three countries, but can't vote in any of them.

I believe in the separation of church and planet.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will make me go in a corner and cry by myself for hours.

A lot has been said about politics; some of it complimentary, but most of it accurate

Learn to trust yourself. That's very vital. ... Just stand with yourself. Remember, in his lifetime, Van Gogh sold only two paintings. I personally sold even fewer.

Life doesn't make any sense, and we all pretend it does. Comedy's job is to point out that it doesn't make sense, and that it doesn't make much difference anyway.

Life is a comedy when watching and a tragedy when experiencing. I try and share anything I have.

Life took over 4 billion years to evolve into you, and you've about 70 more years to enjoy it. Don't just pursue happiness, catch it.

Never do things for money. It's always the things you do for love that turn out to pay the best.

Life has a very simple plot: first you're here and then you're not.

I've got soggy thighs. It must be dinner time.

It's difficult for me to meet women because my crowd is much older. I know that for some of the young women I do meet, a relationship with me can be envisioned as a benefit to their career.

What a dog I got, his favorite bone is in my arm.

Jerry Bruckheimer says that he makes films that he would want to see, and it seems that that coincides with what a lot of people want to see.

I actually don't think of whiteness and heterosexuality as 'the norm'. Maybe there are people who still do but none of them are close friends of mine.

It is the style of idealism to console itself for the loss of something old with the ability to gape at something new.

Affection can no more spoil a child than the sun could be put out by a bucket of gasoline.

Life is good - we forget that.

I wouldn't want to leave it so long before doing a play again, I get very stolid and sluggish if I do too much telly.

The wealth within you, your essence, is your kingdom.

Life, that can shower you with so much splendour, is unremittingly cruel to those who have given up.