I realize I'm not a machine. I'm going to make mistakes.

Vodka does not ease back pain. But it does get your mind off it.

I might not come home with hardware, but I'm winning.

Newspapers do a good job telling me what happened yesterday, but they'd be a lot more impressive if they could tell me what's going to happen tomorrow.

The greatest thing about golf, there's no end to it unless you're dead. You just go from here to the Senior Tour.

I'm glad I don't have to make a living farming. Too much hard work. Too many variables you don't have control over, like, is it going to rain? All I can say is, god bless the real farmers out there.

Life is not a bowl full of cherries, there's good and bad stuff.

Because you pray after you play.

You've got to gamble every once in a while in a round of golf. I'm not afraid to screw up.

I've never been to heaven and, thinking back on my life, I probably won't get a chance to go. I guess the Masters is as close as I'm going to get.

I accept the fact that I'm going to miss it sometimes. I just hope I miss it where I can find it.

A Christian might be tired of the Christianity, but certainly he is scared of the Islam.

His folly has not fellow Beneath the blue of day That gives to man or woman His heart and soul away.

So Rita and I decided that the most subversive, revolutionary thing I could do was to show up for my life and not be ashamed.

I think of [street food] as the antidote to fast food; it's the clear alternative to the king, the clown and the colonel.

When you take a pause before delivering your punch line, you will be using silence as a creative entity in itself.

I admire anyone who rids himself of an addiction.

I spent most of the early years of my walk with God focused on what was wrong with me. Most of us probably do that, hoping to change ourselves.

A pathetic shadow, torn between her envy and thrill of being seen with Masomma, sharing in the attention as a weed would, lapping up water meant for the lily upstream.

Governments arise either out of the people or over the people.