I remember that the priest finally said to me, 'You wouldn't like to have a religion that makes things easy for you.' Now I know that both faith and intellect are components of religious belief.

Sometimes I wonder how I got into comedy at all.

I've been paying alimony since I was 14 and child support since 15. That's a joke, but not by much

I had a wonderful experience on the golf course today. I had a hole in nothing. Missed the ball and sank the divot.

Maxwell is serious, dedicated, awkward, forgetful, pompous to a certain degree, sentimental.

I am a quick study - I can memorize a script in an hour - but I can't remember a name three seconds. I've even forgotten my wife's name on occasion.

It was a special show that became a cult classic of sorts, and I made a lot of money for it.

I like getting married, but I don't like being married.

I did movie star impressions as a kid in high school. Somehow they just got out of hand.

Turn the actions in achieving your goals into systematically repeated things and make them your routine

You are an infinite being with infinite love and infinite thoughts.

Magnificent God.Mighty God.Merciful God.

You can never be free as long as you have an ego to defend.

Acting is all about likability.

It is only doubt that creates. It is only the minority that counts.

Nobody ever grew despondent looking for trouble.

Chefs don't actually say 'That's a spicy meat-a-ball,' except to indicate that there's a bomb threat in the restaurant without alarming the customers. Terrorism is the spiciest meatball there is.

A girl can dazzle - just naturally!

If people stop liking my clothes, I'll make a record.