I saw a sign: "Rest Area 25 Miles". That's pretty big. Some people must be really tired.

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese

You can't have everything. Where would you put it?

To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.

If toast always lands butter-side down, and cats always land on their feet, what happens if you strap toast on the back of a cat and drop it?

I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.

If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?

The other night I was lying in bed, looking up at the stars, and I wondered, 'Where the hell is my roof?

If a man says something in the woods and there are no women there, is he still wrong?

Right now I’m having amnesia and déjà vu at the same time. I think I’ve forgotten this before.

I thought you were gone forever, I thought you’d walked away from everything, because I failed, because I destroyed the only thing that ever mattered to me. I waited for you to come, but you didn’t.

The music at a wedding procession always reminds me of the music of soldiers going into battle.

There are no whole truths. All truths are half-truths. It is trying to treat them as whole truths that plays the devil.

I grew up in Queens, and part of my birthday gift, always, was a Saturday matinee of whatever hit musical there was. When I was three, I saw 'Oliver!'.

The kind of job doesn't matter. The length of time on the job doesn't matter... If you work hard and do your best, you'll be recognized and move onward.

Where I come from, there were traditions with my race and whenever you faced a curve in life, there was always a tradition.

Do you still believe it impossible we exist? You didn't actually think you were the only inhabited planet in the universe. How can any race be so stupid?

Truly every generation discovers the world all new again and knows it can improve it.

Let us not ask for miracles, let us not ask for concern with what is good for the country of him who comes as a stranger to make his fortune and leave afterwards.

Use anything you can think of to understand and be understood, and you'll discover the creativity that connects you with others.