I started on the fringes of journalism as a cartoonist on The Daily Mail.

An uncle gave me a side drum and my mother decided I should have lessons.

I used to look at these pictures of trumpeters pointing their instrument to the ceiling. Stunning pictures, but if you play the trumpet and point it upwards, all the spit comes back into your mouth!

The history of popular music is littered with great partnerships. Rodgers had his Hammerstein, Lennon had his McCartney, and Lloyd Webber had... his photocopier.

Coincidence is a wonderful thing.

Now it's time to play a brand new game called Name That Barcode. Here's the first one: "Thick black, thin white, thick black, thick white, thick black, thin white." OK who's going to identify that?

Only the wise possess ideas the greater part of mankind are possessed by them.

No day is alike - I do many other things, and I'm very active in the environmental movement.

A grateful person is rich in contentment. An ungrateful person suffers in the poverty of endless discontentment.

You've built up so much speed that you HIT 70! After that it's a day-by-day thing; you HIT Wednesday!

Once you are in communion with God, you have the eyes to see and the ears to hear other people in whom God has also found a dwelling place.

The Farrelly brothers make movies the way you imagine a movie set would be when you're a kid - fun all the time.

Surgeon general's job is to protect, promote and advance the health, safety and security of the nation.

Chill December brings the sleet, Blazing fire, and Christmas treat.

Whether it's destiny or fate or whatever, I don't think I could do a French Laundry anywhere else.

I cannot draw a cart, nor eat dried oats; If it be man's work, I'll do't.