I still feel like I gotta prove something. There are a lot of people hoping I fail. But I like that. I need to be hated.

Late night television is ready for someone like me... standards have gone to an all-time low.

I will never vote Democrat again, they are Communists.

Most of the things I do are misunderstood. Hey, after all, being misunderstood is the fate of all true geniuses, is it not?

I am completely pissed off that I'm circumcised.

Talent is what drives this world ... Doesn’t matter how many satellites you f---ing stick in the air.

I think I could create a cult, no problem. The hard part is getting people to kill themselves.

I'm down with just the Backstreet Boys.

When you hire me, you hire a nut who is going to work 24 hours a day for you and never, ever burn his audience.

I've always been about honesty, whether on the radio, whether I did a movie, whether I wrote a book. As long as you're honest, you don't lose your edge.

You've got to be a little vicious. You've got to be narcissistic. You've got to be on fire about your career.

Knowledge makes you strong, understanding makes you formidable, wisdom makes you powerful, and love makes you invincible.

Don’t trust anybody else—no matter how close you are to them.” (Eric)

When you trust yourself, you sow the seeds of fear into the hearts of your enemies!

A feeling of discouragement when you slip up is a sure sign that you put your faith in deeds

Many dishes many diseases, Many medicines few cures.

There's no such thing as bad weather - only the wrong clothes.

Everything really needs to be paraben-free for me. I mean, because if I’m going to smoke cigarettes, then I need to be aware of all the other bullshit I’m putting into my body.

One good thing about TV is, if you die violently, God forbid, on camera, you will not have died in vain because you will be great entertainment.

Wildflowers are the stuff of my heart!

Freedom really means the freedom to make mistakes.