I stood and walked around the desk so I could stand over him. Menacingly. Like Darth Vader, only with better lung capacity.

I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of jack daniels.

You know you have ADD when Look A chicken - T-shirt

I may not look like much, but I'm an expert at pretending to be a ninja.

Never knock on death's door. Ring the doorbell then run. He totally hates that. - T-shirt

You called me at four thirty-four....I hate four thirty-four. I think four thirty-four should be banned and replaced with something more reasonable, like, say, nine twelve.

He bombarded me with words, of all things, apparently clueless to the fact that the predawn hours rendered me incapable of coherent thought.

Maybe I needed sensitivity training. I once signed up for an anger management class, but the instructor pissed me off.

If I couldn't be a good example, I'd just have to be a horrible warning.

You rented the apartment with a dead guy in the corner?” I shrugged. “I wanted the apartment, and I figured I could cover him up with a bookcase or something.

My powers of persuasion are only as strong as the bullshit I have to back it up.- Charley Davidson

The only thing that will make us remain glued to being the victim is our failure to handle the emotions that we go through and the pain that overcomes us.

Nos·tal·gia (n):A feeling that lingers long after the taste is gone.

There were a few things scarier than a bipolar vampire off his meds, but to be honest, not that many.

War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

When I was a very little boy, I lived underneath the air pattern of LaGuardia airport in New York and I watched the planes fly to their destinations. I was in love with the design of these airplanes.

A deck of cards was built like the purest of hierarchies, with every card a master to those below it and a lackey to those above it.

I was a Republican until I got to New York and had to live on $18 a week. It was then that I became a Democrat.

I took a lot of bad things after Athens. I just learnt to deal with it. The problem was beforehand I had this feeling where I was trying to please everybody - I wanted everybody to like me.

If you're lucky enough to have a few hundred thousand dollars in the bank account, that should be sufficient for your own personal needs, and anything more than that you've got to put to good use.

The voice of the people, the voice of God.