I suppose he must have taken about a nine or something in hats. Shows what a rotten thing it is to let your brain develop too much.

Why don't you get a haircut? You look like a chrysanthemum.

There is only one cure for gray hair. It was invented by a Frenchman. It is called the guillotine.

There is no surer foundation for a beautiful friendship than a mutual taste in literature.

It is never difficult to distinguish between a Scotsman with a grievance and a ray of sunshine.

I always advise people never to give advice.

The fascination of shooting as a sport depends almost wholly on whether you are at the right or wrong end of the gun.

Gussie, a glutton for punishment, stared at himself in the mirror.

It was my Uncle George who discovered that alcohol was a food well in advance of modern medical thought.

As we grow older and realize more clearly the limitations of human happiness, we come to see that the only real and abiding pleasure in life is to give pleasure to other people.

The voice of Love seemed to call to me, but it was a wrong number.

It was the sort of beauty you feel so deeply it becomes contagious and somehow makes you feel beautiful too.

Jay-Z and Kanye West are to authentic rap culture what diseased rates were to 14th century Europeans

Look on every exit as being an entrance somewhere else.

So... Stop shaking my heart like this.

It's a new era at Disney. From now on, Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs will be known as Person of No Color and the Seven Vertically Challenged Individuals.

I am affected, not because you have deceived me, but because I can no longer believe in you.

In producers, loafing is productive; and no creator, of whatever magnitude, has ever been able to skip that stage, any more than a mother can skip gestation.

Hey, I saw this old British movie, all the people spoke so different, you could hardly understand them. But everyone here speaks American as good as you and me. What's with that?

A man is not from where he is born, but where he chooses to die.

Everybody's tragedy is somebody's nuisance.