I think fur looks better on an animal than on a human being. So I dress my dog in a mink teddy.

I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing.

When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me.

My computer beat me at checkers, but I sure beat it at kickboxing.

I was the kid next door's imaginary friend.

My classmates would copulate with anything that moved, but I never saw any reason to limit myself.

My girlfriend told me that she was seeing another man. I told her to rub her eyes.

I was in a bar the other night, hopping from barstool to barstool, trying to get lucky, but there wasn't any gum under any of them.

I've learned that you can't make someone love you. All you can do is stalk them and hope they'll panic and give in.

People come up to me and say, 'Emo, do people really come up to you?'

Not everybody goes to movies to get their life changed.

I don't worry about how accurately I convey my personality. I learned early on that it's almost impossible to accurately portray yourself.

I face every project the same way - do it right and give 110%. 100% isn't good enough.

The life and fellowship of the church is to be a foretaste of life in the Kingdom of God.

I never really thought about being an actress or being anything like that. I was always a bit scared as well because of the thing about models becoming an actress and all that.

I'm not defined by what people think of me. My happiness comes from within.

Cause your opponent to repent, then let him fall

Labels are distancing phenomena. They push us away from each other.

You can't make people stop loving each other just because a law says it's wrong.

Me shooting 40% at the foul line is just God's way to say nobody's perfect.