I think human beings probably resonate with audiences more than bunnies, but who knows?

Son, if you really want something in life, you have to work for it. Now quiet, they're about to announce the lottery numbers.

The scary thing about the future... there will be tiny cameras everywhere, and they'll be flying around like mosquitoes and drones. That will be bad. Drones are scary. You can't reason with a drone.

Vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos.

God often gives nuts to toothless people.

Donuts. Is there anything they can't do?

America's health care system is second only to Japan, Canada, Sweden, Great Britain, well ... all of Europe. But you can thank your lucky starts we don't live in Paraguay!

Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the ice weasels come.

You should listen to your heart, and not the voices in your head.

I’ll keep it short and sweet - Family. Religion. Friendship. These are the three demons you must slay if you wish to succeed in business.

We've got a bunch of new writers now who tell me they grew up watching The Simpsons. It's bizarre, and they're writing some very funny stuff.

Self-pity, while it should be accorded due respect, is the greatest of all acids to the human soul.

The great thing about Ayurveda is that its treatments always yield side benefits, not side effects.

Your life oppositions will position or disposition you in the best or worst way depending how you position or disposition your oppositions.

If you can't be a hero, you can at least be funny while being a chicken.

In her presence I could dare everything: sincerity, emotion, pathos.

Pain is what I feed from when nothing else will nourish the noxious fury in my heart. It’s what I cling to when everything else—everyone else—slips right between my grasping fingers.

When I became successful as a model in the United States, I knew that my chance to be heard had come and so I took it.

Meeting important emotional needs creates the feeling of love, but thoughtfulness keeps it alive.

The vices are never so well employed as in combating one another.

What every genuine philosopher (every genuine man, in fact) craves most is praise although the philosophers generally call it recognition!