I think in doing stand-up there are no rules and there's no architecture.

I don't chase after things, but I put forward the effort and know the rest of it is out of my hands.

I don't necessarily self-identify as a writer, 'cause it implies a certain level of intelligence.

The thing about narcissistic people is that they don't think they're being narcissistic.

Your harshest critic is always going to be yourself. Don't ignore that critic, but don't give it more attention than it deserves.

I take my coffee like I take my women... strong... black... and proud.

Internet fame is like regular fame only without all the annoying 'money' and 'power.'

Super excited about things I'm going to do; never excited about things I'm actually doing.

You have to lead, in the case of a game show, a contestant through the architecture of the show. So there's a lot of rules there, literal and implied, that you have to navigate.

Whatever I write I publish. Because that's where the money is.

Shuffling really isn't something you should be doing on your deathbed.

Maxim 30: A little trust goes a long way. The less you use, the further you'll go.-The Seventy Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries

The thankful receiver bears a plentiful harvest.

Beyond the rudiments, it is up to the artist to create art, not the camera.

But there was something about you that made me think of sparks and motion.

That's a big deal for kids, when they come into the kitchen and the teacher is drinking coffee with mom. They react differently on the next day when you say: 'Sit down and shut-up!'

You cannot hate a people and reach a people at the same time.

Coincidence. That's an explanation used by fools and liars.

Limit your thinking and expectation today to only the things God can do.

I love accessories. I'm a girl. I love shoes. I love handbags.