I think it gets uncomfortable when you try to act like you didn't just tell a joke that bombed.

To me this is not yelling. I am not yelling. I'm just passionate about my opinions and I want to tell you all of them before you start talking again.

Haven't you noticed that every time the government f-ks up McDonald's has a new sandwich?

Only an adult with dying dreams can appreciate how awesome it is to have a dog.

God's everywhere, but I gotta go down (to church) to see him? Really? And he's mad at me down there, and I owe you money?

Let's go to Brunch. What a great idea! Why would you want to sleep in on a Sunday when you can go pay $18 for eggs? Now, you're thinking.

Surround yourself with positive people. Also, be a positive person. Root for people. Somebody else's success is not your failure.

My favorite kind of humor is basically, if it was happening to you, it wouldn't be funny, but to observe it, it's hilarious.

Nothing worse than when a 6 acts like a 10.

I've never wanted to kill myself over anything major. It's always the little things that do me in.

Your twenties is all about taking your childhood out on everyone that you run into.

The foundation of success is intense desire.

Climbing at altitude is like hitting your head against a brick wall - it's great when you stop.

As long as I am alive, I am fully committed to amity between Tibetans and Chinese. Otherwise there's no use.

I can say that. I have a television show.

I was an anti-communist before I was political in other ways.

Only a fool does not fear actors, but you can't beat them, and if you can't beat them, join them, as they say. As I've got older I've become very interested in that part of the work

It is not possible to speak of the right to choose when a clear moral evil is involved, when what is at stake is the commandment, Do not kill!

Be not the slave of your own past.

I bet you can't eat ten bananas!" "I bet you're right.

The world is full of love and pity, I say. Had there been less suffering, there would have been less kindness.