I think it's a really important thing for women to be able to just put their hands up and go, I can't actually do any more.

We must recall the most important of humanity guidelines: Be polite. Being polite is possibly the greatest daily contribution everyone can make to life on Earth.

I love puffins. They are small, round gothic birds, and their babies are called pufflings.

The world is difficult and we are all breakable. So just be kind.

My core belief is that if you're complaining about something for more than three minutes, two minutes ago you should have done something about it.

When a woman says, ‘I have nothing to wear!’, what she really means is, ‘There’s nothing here for who I’m supposed to be today.

I want a Zero Tolerance policy on All The Patriarchal Bullshit.

It's always sunny above the clouds. Always. Every day on earth - every day I have ever had - was secretly sunny, after all.

When I hear women talking about how their wedding is going to be/was the best day of their life, I can’t help but think, You just haven’t taken enough MDMA in a field at 3 a.m., love.

I like a little bit of revolution. I think it's a very good hobby for a young woman. Better than squash.

Flyaway, problem hair is the enemy of feminism, and was probably invented by the Man to crush Susan Sontag.

I don't want to earn my living, I want to live.

...we ought not meanwhile to make use of doubt in the conduct of life.

There is nothing more reassuring than knowing that the world is crazier than you are.

You know, if you're an American and you're born at this time in history especially, you're lucky. We all are. We won the world history Powerball lottery.

Doesn't the fight for survival also justify swindle and theft? In self defence, anything goes.

It is true that our skin is sort of more or less the same shade. But is it true that our skin color makes us a distinctive race? No.

When I work, I try to eat as much vegetarian as possible. When I do Cupid, I eat vegetarian because I need the energy. I've got those wings on my back.

My writing process is very feedback-based. When I do stand-up, I listen to the audience. I try to understand what's connecting, what's not connecting, and then rewrite, rewrite and rewrite.

I made a living out of being a class clown

Nothing impresses the mind with a deeper feeling of loneliness than to tread the silent and deserted scene of former throng and pageant.