I think life is easier if you're straight.

I don't care if you want to hunt, I don't care if you think it's your right. I say, sorry, you are not allowed to own a gun, and if you do own a gun I think you should go to prison.

Christianity is just as threatening as radical Islam in a country like America...

I just want to say something. 655,000 Iraqi civilians are dead. Who are the terrorists?

The Second Amendment is not really a right.

I act irrationally, I defy the odds, I engage when others would run. I look for trouble, I seek chaos, it is a burden.

Don't fear the terrorists. They're mothers and fathers.

I think there should be a law - and I know this is extreme - that no one can have a gun in the U.S. If you have a gun, you go to jail. Only the police should have guns.

I'd love to be a dead body in the emergency room and have George Clooney go, 'This one's gone!' while he puts a sheet on me.

I've been on every diet in the world. I've been on Slim-Fast. For breakfast you have a shake. For lunch, you have a shake. For dinner, you kill anyone with food on their plate.

I'm not going to let my life revolve around losing weight. I have other things to do.

WTF is praying gonna do for Vegas? Apparently God likes mass shootings.

Fantasy Is Not Reality, it is unrealistic to expect your future mate to match your fantasies.

Flaming enthusiasm, backed up by horse sense and persistence, is the quality that most frequently makes for success.

Of course, you can never really know if someone is fully revealing himself to you or not, so all we can go by is our own gut feelings.

Life doesn't last, art doesn't last

The RNC was run so badly you could walk through their deepest competence and not get your ankles wet.

I want to eat good Italian food and get better at their language. It seems so romantic too.

So much depends, therefore, upon our maintaining gospel perspective in the midst of ordinariness, the pressures of temptation, tribulation, deprivation, and the cares of the world.

I got hoes in different area codes