I think stand is better now than it's ever been. I think it's the greatest time ever to do standup comedy.

If you ever start taking things too seriously, just remember that we are talking monkeys on an organic spaceship flying through the universe.

The people I know that have the hardest time keeping it together emotionally are people that don't workout.

The time you spend hating on someone robs you of your own time. You are literally hating on yourself and you don't even realize it.

One of the most fascinating lessons I've absorbed about life is that the struggle is good.

Build confidence and momentum with each good decision you make from here on out and choose to be inspired.

The key to happiness doesn't lay in numbers in a bank account but in the way we make others feel.

You're just part of the soup of the universe, so just try to enjoy what's good about it.

Greatness and madness are next door neighbours; and they borrow each other's sugar. You don't get there without the other.

This country has a mental health problem disguised as a gun problem, and a tyranny problem disguised as a security problem.

There's a direct correlation between positive energy and positive results.

Jesus’ promise of resurrection of believers came with a demonstration. He did it and said His followers who die will do same. This is leadership! It’s based on truth!

When too many Americans don't vote or participate, some see apathy and despair. I see disappointment and even outrage. And I believe that out of this frustration can come hope and action.

You learn early as an actor that creating your own material is the only way to have any control.

I wondered over again for the hundredth time what could be the principle which, in the wildest, most lawless, fantastically chaotic, apparently capricious work of Nature, always kept it beautiful.

If you can't stand the heat, then move to Minnesota. They have snow in May.

I do a lot of revising. Certain chapters six or seven times. Occasionally you can hit it right the first time. More often, you don't.

I wash my hands, wonder how an awful day could turn even worse. It seems like at some point you'd just run out of awful.

It's easy to have the wrong type of people around you.

I hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving. Or, as it's known to Native Americans - Sarcastic You're Welcomesgiving.

Will Fortune never come with both hands full, But write her fair words still in foulest terms?