I think we should just tip the government if it does a good job. Fifteen percent is the standard tip, isn't it?

All the problems we face in the United States today can be traced to an unenlightened immigration policy on the part of the American Indian.

Why should we tell kidnappers, murderers, and embezzlers their rights? If they don't know their rights, they shouldn't be in the business.

No Taxes. Let's just tip the government 15% if they do a good job.

I must choose my words carefully in order to avoid any negative interpretation. Among politicians, this is a tactic known as lying.

Assuming either the Left Wing or the Right Wing gained control of the country, it would probably fly around in circles.

I read an article that said one in five Americans thinks Elvis is alive. I want to find those morons and get them registered to vote for me.

I am neither left wing nor right wing. I am middle-of-the-bird.

Having a comic in the White House will assure stability in foreign relations. The world will continue to respond to foreign initiatives by saying, 'You must be joking.'

We have nothing to fear but fear itself...and of course the boogieman.

Deep down, I happen to be very shallow.

Let your infectious smile infect the whole world with love and joy.

A whole stack of memories never equal one little hope.

The Bible without the Holy Spirit is a sundial by moonlight.

I'm having a hard time trying to figure out how to say things. I'm a little exhausted by the process.

Obama had a mandate for change and Trump clearly does not.

The Republicans would like to take us back to a darker time, when corporations ruled and the underserved had no rights.

As you speed along the highway of life ... you might pause and consider. When everything's coming your way, maybe you're driving in the wrong lane.

I dress women the way I see them and the way I envision them from day one, thus my customer knows that what she is looking for she will get.

We must always embrace individual liberty and enforce the constitutional rights of all Americans-rich and poor, immigrant and native, black and white.

It is false to believe that the sun revolves around the earth, but it is not absurd.