I think you actually get a kick out of being disappointed and under-achieving, because it's easier, isn't it? Failure and unhappiness is easier because you can make a joke out of it.

You can live your whole life not realizing that what you're looking for is right in front of you.

This is where it all begins. Everything starts here, today.

Be nice wont you?" "I am nice, I'm always nice." "But not too nice. I mean don't make a religion out of it, niceness.

Cherish your friends, stay true to your principles, live passionately and fully and well. Experience new things. Love and be loved, if you ever get the chance

Envy was just the tax you paid on success.

Salmon. Salmon, salmon, salmon, salmon. I eat so much salmon at these weddings, twice a year I get this urge to swim upstream.

I'm not the consolation prize, Dex. I'm not something you resort to. I happen to think I'm worth more than that.

Whatever happens tomorrow, we had today; and I'll always remember it

No, friends were like clothes: fine while they lasted but eventually they wore thin or you grew out of them.

Just kidding' was exactly what people wrote when they meant every word.

Insofar as men gain time, ease, independence, or liberty from women's domestic labors, they lack incentive to change.

Plus as she put it, Prince Eric was far too hairy and peach colored for her taste. I always thought he was pretty hott, but then again, I am a mammal.

Against these two [Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton] I would [vote], but I never voted for [Barack Obama]. I always voted third party - the ones who say their gonna jail the bankers.

A story is how we construct our experiences.

There's a Hidden Valley ranch party in my mouth.

If I work with a bad actor, my reaction is to immediately become worse than they are.

Peace will come to the world when the people have enough noodles to eat.

We are a country of excess. So it's not the violence, per se, but the exacerbation and constant repetition.

Excellence isn't about meeting the spec, it's about setting the spec.

Run, Bella, run. I love you too much, for your good or mine.