I think you gotta look at stuff half-full as opposed to half-empty.

I was one of the first veejays to take the camera out on location, and that's what was unique about MTV at that time.

I kind of was raised at The Comedy Store by comedians. When you see my dad on stage before me and then you see me, you'll see where I got a lot of my stuff.

Serious and intense people, they drain you. But someone who's an idiot, like myself, they're fun. You either hate me or you love me.

Whenever someone dies everyone says, I love that guy, except for Jeffrey Dahmer.

I want to do an 'Extreme Makeover' show. You know that MTV show 'I Want To Have A Famous Face'? Well, I want to do a new show. I want to have a different famous face.

My mom is two people to me. She's my mom number one, and then she's this lady most comedians know as being a legendary owner of a nightclub that's responsible for starting a lot of heavy careers.

I liked Evel Knievel, and that game Mouse Trap. That was pretty cool.

I giggle when I put myself down. It's just funny to me.

Comedy wasn't something I chose - it chose me.

I'm not used to getting good reviews.

Pleasure awakens the body, wisdom awakens the mind, joy awakens the heart, and love awakens the soul.

I've been ignored by prettier women than you, but none who carried the heavy pitchers of silenceso far, without spilling a drop.

Extroverts sparkle, introverts glow. Extroverts are fireworks, introverts are a fire in the hearth.

Enduring means accepting. Accepting things as they are and not as you would wish them to be, and then looking ahead, not behind.

I love watching people's dreams come true.

I’ve come to believe that, fundamentally, art matters more than politics.

Wickedness is a kind of voluntary frenzy, and a chosen distraction.

You have nothing to do but to save souls; therefore spend and be spent in this work.

There's a responsibility level that comes along with being a public figure. I can use this for really cool things. That really [allows] me to be very honest about my experiences.