I thought if I had straight hair and a perfect nose, my whole career would be different.

A squirrel is just a rat with a cuter outfit!

Being single used to mean that nobody wanted you. Now it means you're pretty sexy and you're taking your time deciding how you want your life to be and who you want to spend it with.

As we speed along this endless road to the destination called who we hope to be, I can't help but whine, 'Are we there yet?'.

I don't believe in email. I'm an old-fashioned girl. I prefer calling and hanging up.

Follow your instincts and do not let other people's opinion of you become your opinion of yourself.

It's like the riddle of the Sphinx... why are there so many great unmarried women, and no great unmarried men?

Balls are to men what purses are to women.

After all, computers crash, people die, relationships fall apart. The best we can do is breath and reboot.

People go to casinos for the same reason they go on blind dates - hoping to hit the jackpot. But mostly, you just wind up broke or alone in a bar.

I got to thinking about relationships and partial lobotomies. Two seemingly different ideas that might just be perfect together - like chocolate and peanut butter.

Because in some other universe, you are me, I am you, and we are perfectly happy together. Or perhaps not… and just like this…

A library implies an act of faith which generations, still in darkness hid, sign in their night in witness of the dawn." (1872)

I'm a devil at a quick mistake, and when I make one it takes the form of Lead.

The extinction rate is so huge now, we're to the stage where we've got to set up recombinant ecologies. There are no longer enough species left, anywhere, to hold the system together.

To live under the American Constitution is the greatest political privilege that was ever accorded to the human race.

I think if my eight-year-old self could see me at the Royal Albert Hall winning a prize for playing the Doctor on telly, he would need a stiff shot of Irn-Bru.

The Negro revolt is not aimed at winning friends but at winning freedom, not interpersonal warmth but institutional justice.

Entropy requires no maintenance.

A friend in need is a friend to be avoided.

To do good, you actually have to do something.