I totally should've gone to Hogwarts when I had the chance.

You can't fix stupid, but you can numb it was a 2 by 4.--T-SHIRT

I stop fighting my inner demons. We're on the same side now. T-shirt

We're like the Three Musketeers, searching for truth and justice and the American way.: Glitch snorted. "More like the Three Blind Mice, stumbling around trying to find a hunk of cheese in the dark.

I went down like a drunken cowgirl trying to line dance to Metallica.

There is a great need for a sarcasm font.

Reyes Farrow. Because perfection is a dirty job, but someone has to do it.

I lowered the gun but didn’t holster it. Not just yet. She could turn out to be psychotic. Or a door-to-door salesperson.

I meant to behave. There were just too many other options.--T-SHIRT

Chocolate and coffee ? Together ? Whoever came up with that combination should have won a Nobel Peace Prize. Or at least a subscription to Reader's Digest.

Don't judge me because I'm quiet. No one plans a murder out loud.

Opening her mouth to take a bite seemed forward. Chewing? Obscene. Mutual mastication was out of the question.

Cast away care he that loves sorrow lengthens not a day nor can he buy tomorrow.

God made you on purpose, for a purpose

If television encouraged us to work as much as it encourages us to do everything else, we could better afford to buy more of everything it advertises.

No; but you came, and found the riddles waiting for you! Indeed you are yourself the only riddle. What you call riddles are truths, and seem riddles because you are not true.

Maybe [Donald Trump] is just never dealt with somebody who's not particularly impressed by his carrying on, but I'm not. So I'm going to stay focused on what's at stake in this election.

In what pagan nation was Moloch ever propitiated by such an unbroken and swift-moving procession of victims as are offered to this Moloch of Christendom, intemperance.

People pour themselves into their own doctrines, and God has to blast them out of their preconceived ideas before they can become devoted to Jesus Christ.

I'm too full to swallow my pride

At Christmas, I no more desire a rose.