I try not to laugh too loud, afraid a bark-like noise will be mistaken by any great whites lurking in the area as the distress call of a juvenile seal.

Be yourself. Unless you can be a unicorn, In that case, you should always be a unicorn.

I slump in my chair, thinking how a narcotic party of one is no party at all.

Aw, you’re nothing but heart, Mako. Nice valentine in your skull, by the way. Is that temporary or did the Tanaka-kai change their daimon to attract the Powerpuff Girls crowd?

If you ever pull a switcheroo like that again, Dee, I’m going to offer your boyfriend ten thousand dollars to make out with Alice for two minutes.

Faye, if you got eaten by another shark, would you please at least have the decency to say so? My time is kind of limited, if you know what I’m sayin’.

Turns out making a dramatic exit is a lot harder when you have to stand there and wait another twenty minutes for a boat to dock.

Enjoy your little run because there’s no way you get off this boat without her trying to slice your Achilles in half.

The words ‘drink me’ come to mind. Anyone besides me up for some heavy alcohol consumption?

Oh, Alice, you haven’t even had a taste of my romantic streak yet. And when the time’s right I don’t think I’ll have to ‘try’ to have my way with you. I just WILL.

Have you thrown ‘Why is a raven like a writing desk?’ at her yet?

People are less quick to applaud you as you grow older. Life starts out with everyone clapping when you take a poo and goes downhill from there.

You don't enter a dance studio and say "I can't do that." If you do, then why are you in the studio in the first place?

The most enduring contributions made to civilization have not been made by brawn, they have been made by brain.

Without freedom there can be no morality.

There is nothing more dangerous than security.

He just got in the car, but the batteries dead. So he asks to use the phone and she gives him some head.

The people are responsible for the character of their Congress.

It takes good memory to keep up a lie

I'm a old hoodlum, so I will jump on you if I have to.

Perhaps there is only one cardinal sin: impatience. Because of impatience we were driven out of Paradise, because of impatience we cannot return.