I try to be as ignorant about things as I can.

You would not believe how much time people waste in a day. And how little time they put into things they genuinely love.

If 'Airplane!' comes on, it's like a comfort film. You can always guarantee a laugh watching that movie.

Sometimes I play guitar like a frustrated drummer.

'Jerry Springer' is just kind of the chubby, redneck version of throwing Christians to the lions.

If you take anything I say with any seriousness whatsoever, go study Yang style tai chi. It will make you live longer.

Truth be told, ginormous portions have become a pet peeve of mine.

I'm a futurist. Technology is our way out of almost every problem we have. Technology can create a new sense of community.

It's better to waste money than time. You can always get more money.

I noticed a lot of guitar players neglected the rhythm part of rhythm guitar and decided I would try to focus in that.

I'm a writer, so I like dissecting things.

At some point we all look up and realize we are lost in a maze.

One generation passes away, and another generation cometh forth: but the earth abides for ever.

Self-preservation isn't worth it if you can't live with the self you're preserving.

I wish our clever young poets would remember my homely definitions of prose and poetry that is prose - words in their best order poetry - the best words in their best order.

I think there are a lot of people who really want to be famous, they really do. I don't. It sort of gets in the way of the everyday things that I do.

She was astonished, and at the same time she knew. There were many things in life like that. You couldn’t imagine it, and then it happened and you couldn’t really imagine it hadn’t.

Songwriting is like fishing in a stream; you put in your line and hope to catch something. And I don't think anyone downstream from Bob Dylan ever caught anything.

Give, but, if possible, spare the poor man the shame of begging.

It's remarkably easy to dig up enormous amounts of information about individuals, without their consent.

Stir the eggnog, lift the toddy, Happy New Year everybody.