I used to do drugs, but that was way back there.

Pre-mature ejaculation. Let's talk about it. Premature ejaculation. That's a pretty fancy term for, "Ooooooh Oh no. This has never happened before."

My gym has two-pound weights. If you're using two-pound weights, how did you even open the door to the gym? What's your dream? To pump up and open your mail?

Yeah, I know, some people are against drunk driving, and I call those people 'the cops.' But you know, sometimes, you've just got no choice; those kids gotta get to school!

Let's say you're in a situation where crystal meth can help you. Like, I don't know, you have too many teeth.

Remember when you're young and you think your dad is Superman? And then you grow up and realized he's just a drunk who wears a cape.

Don't get me wrong, I like to cuddle. But there is such a fine line between cuddling and holding someone down so that they can't get away.

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin.

Women have all the power because women have all the vaginas.

You know, men and women are a lot alike in certain situations. Like when they're both on fire - they're exactly alike.

You ever make fun of someone so much, you think you should thank them for all the good times you've had?

Ten books in and the Red Stone Security series is still going strong because of you, my wonderful readers. Thank you.

It’s not that easy living with malaria. The reality of the high annual death toll should make that very obvious.

Isn't it splendid to think of all the things there are to find out about? It just makes me feel glad to be alive- it's such an interesting world.

True love is humble, thereby is it known; Girded for service, seeking not its own; Vaunts not itself, but speaks in self-dispraise.

You start to get nervous when the value of a comic book or graphic novel is relative to the achievements of some other medium.

I am trapped in glass and I want to break out and breath deep but I´m too afraid that it will hurt.

We didn't realize it at the time, but the release date, the ad campaign and the poster are so important.

As for feminism, I am a womanist more than I'm a feminist.

I think that was a moment of cool panic there.

Life is too short to be small.