I've always believed that there are funny people everywhere, but they're just not comedians. In fact, some of my best comedic inspirations were not professional entertainers.

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.

Before you criticize a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you do criticize him, you'll be a mile away and have his shoes.

Talking about music is like dancing about architecture.

I believe the United States should allow all foreigners in this country, provided they can speak our native language... Apache.

Be so good they can't ignore you.

I think I did pretty well, considering I started out with nothing but a bunch of blank paper.

I thought yesterday was the first day of the rest of my life but it turns out today is.

Relationships end, but they don't end your life. But people do often spending more time finding out about failed relationships than finding successful ones.

Relationships end, but they don't end your life.

Some people have a way with words, and other people...oh, uh, not have way.

Things do not change

It requires a deliberate mental effort to turn biology the right way up again, and remind ourselves that the replicators come first, in importance as well as in history.

Indeed the presence of outstanding strengths presupposes that energy needed in other areas has been channeled away from them.

If you absolutely believe that what you do is right, you're bullet-proof.

I'm not condemning the Catholic Church - it's too big, it's like condemning a nation and that would be prejudiced.

Knowing is the same thing as the inner voice.

Pizza is a circle. Pizza is my life. Pizza is the circle of life.

If you have the right attitude, interesting problems will find you.

Often a man goes on for years imaging that the religious teaching that had been imparted to him since childhood is still intact, while all the time there is not a trace of it left in him.

Bitterness is a result of clinging to negative experiences. It serves you no good, and closes the door to your future.