I've been broke, and I've been in debt, and broke is better.

Money can't buy happiness—but it can buy beer.

I had never liked bullying of any sort, especially when an individual acquires his courage by becoming part of a faceless mob. I always say if you need fake courage, get it out of a bottle like I do.

... occasionally I see rich-looking women on Rollerblades gripping leashes and being towed bodily by golden retrievers. That's my kind of jogging.

A lot of artists start out as failed poets, then move on to being failed short-story writers before they finally break through to the big time and become failed novelists.

Being a cab river is not unlike being a magician--minus the top hat, the cape, the rabbit, an the gorgeous assistant. But you do have an audience.

Adverbs and cops always come in pairs.

I was in the land of fakes and frauds and phonies-I felt like saying “Howdy cousin,” to everybody who walked by.

It's a funny thing about writing. You get so balled up in a story idea that you lose your perspective and forget that human being might read your words someday.

I was driving pretty much the way everyone drives in LA, like elephants dancing on each others’ backs at a circus.

She looked confused. She looked off-balance. That's a technique I employ to get dates, and it always works.

When life gives you lemons, use Cosmic Ordering!

‎Halt looked up at the trees above him."Why does this boy ask so many questions?" he asked the trees.Naturally, they didn't answer.

Detroit: Cars and rock 'n' roll. Not a bad combo.

You must be in fashion is the utterance of weak headed mortals.

I am a man of fixed and unbending principles, the first of which is to be flexible at all times.

Down deep in every soul has a hidden longing, impulse, and ambition to do something fine and enduring...If you are willing, great things are possible to you.

I speak relatively little, except when I'm at home and I'm asking for things.

I want Apple to continue to innovate. I want them to be on time. I want them to be leaders. And my big concern with Apple recently has been they can't build what they're designing.

There's not a huge pile of scripts at home. It's what happens to be on the table at that moment with your availability. And then you have no control over when these things come out.

Women alone stir my imagination.