I've been out of work so many times in my life that relying too much on just one job is terrifying.

We're not in an information age anymore. We're in the information management age.

Nerds get caught up in minutiae, because there is a tremendous and fulfilling sense of control in understanding every single detail of a thing more than any other living creature.

Bowling is all physics and energy distribution. It's F = ma. So it is actually one of the most science-y sports, because it literally is just a ball and a surface and objects to knock down.

When you hang around a lot of comedians long enough, you realize there's a certain gene, in every comedian. It's why we get hyper-analytical about things.

I do seem like the kind of guy who'd be obsessive about Rubik's Cubes.

No matter what tricks you use or what decisions you make, go easy on yourself as someone who's on a never-ending quest for improvement.

Steal moments of happiness if you have to, and then collect them until they are the dominant images in your psyche.

I almost think of nerd brains as rattlesnake venom; like, you can milk it. You can milk the pulpy venom out of the nerd brain and use it for good if you want to.

Humans cannot produce viable offspring with our closest animal cousin: the chimpanzee. We cannot impregnate a chimp. So you know what that means? No condoms.

I've gone from being bullied by jocks as a kid to being bullied by nerds as an adult.

A good presentation = Conviction + Story + Message. Subject does't matter.

For even if we know very little that is certain about spirit or soul, the true nature of the body, of materiality, is totally unknown and incomprehensible to us.

Age does not protect you from love. But love to some extent protects you from age.

My only good result in 1997 was marrying Brooke Shields.

Taste, like identity, has value only when there are differences.

It's just as valuable to curate content as it is to create it.

I had a soft-spot in my heart for Ronald Reagan, if only because he was a sportswriter in his youth.

I'll commit suicide before I vote on a clean minimum-wage bill.

I'm just gonna do my own kinda swag of kinda dumbing something down and speaking some knowledge.

My father is a very theatrical and dramatic person.