I've been told to speed up my delivery when I perform. But if I lose the stammer, I'm just another slightly amusing accountant.

Comedians are never really on vacation because you're always at attention... that antenna is always out there.

I think you should be a child for as long as you can. I have been successful for 74 years being able to do that. Don't rush into adulthood, it isn't all that much fun.

I love portraying the totally indifferent person.

I'm most proud of the longevity of my marriage, my kids, and my grandchildren. If you don't have that, you really don't have very much.

I don't like country music, but I don't mean to denigrate those who do. And for the people who like country music, denigrate means 'put down'.

Laughter gives us distance. It allows us to step back from an event, deal with it and then move on.

People with a sense of humor tend to be less egocentric and more realistic in their view of the world and more humble in moments of success and less defeated in times of travail.

It's getting harder and harder to differentiate between schizophrenics and people talking on a cell phone. It still brings me up short to walk by somebody who appears to be talking to themselves.

I was never a Certified Public Accountant. I just had a degree in accounting. It would require passing a test, which I would not have been able to do.

I still feel thirty, except when I try to run.

Even kings and emperors, with mountains of property and oceans of wealth - these are not even equal to an ant, who does not forget God.

Affliction caused by the tongue is worse than that caused by the strike of the blade of a sword.

Not everyone will appreciate the beauty of their surroundings like you do. Spend time with those that do.

Peace in Mind will make life fine

We can all do good deeds, but very few of us can think good thoughts.

When we turn our attention away from ourselves, our potential is limitless.

And the people I'm best friends with on the films are not generally the actors.

I hate the word "inevitable" because I feel like things don't have to be the way they are.

I was trying to write a straightforward book of sociological analysis, or at least cultural criticism, and I failed.

A war with Pakistan would be an utter disaster.