I've given my phone number to the weirdest people. I get texts from people all the time.

I'm at the stage in my life that real-estate apps turn me on.

I was supposed to be a professional rollerblader!

The show has to be good because you want to be good. But if it's not good, it doesn't matter.

I would have liked to be a comedian in the '20s, or maybe even a comedian on the Mayflower and have a statue somewhere.

There are way too many comedians now.

There's nothing worse than a poorly staged house.

When you're filming something, you have marks and spots you have to be in.

I think a lot of comedians sometimes pretend to find the job more taxing than it is.

You can knock on a deaf man's door forever.

Never bullshit a bullshitter.

If the sun refuses to rise we will make it rise

Your sensitivity, your tenderness, your eyes make me pick up my pen and write, Mrignayni!

Juno MacGuff: Nah... I mean, I'm already pregnant, so what other kind of shenanigans could I get into?

America is still a government of the naive, for the naive, and by the naive. He who does not know this, nor relish it, has no inkling of the nature of his country.

Mostly I use the O2 as an X terminal, however, running my apps on Linux and displaying remotely.

Anticipation is a bad sleeping draught.

It's a pity that the tennis is really going down the drain. Every year it's getting worse and worse and worse. There has to be a radical change, and I hope it will be really soon.

Everyone is passionate about something. Usually more than one thing. We are born with it.