I've never been drunk but often I've been overserved.

Did you ever get the feeling that the world was a tuxedo and you were a pair of brown shoes?

If inflation continues to soar, you're going to have to work like a dog just to live like one

I've never been drunk, but often I've been overserved.

My uncle was the town drunk - and we lived in Chicago.

If you build a better mousetrap, you will catch better mice.

When I go to a party, nobody says hello. But when I leave, everybody says goodbye.

College is a place to keep warm between high school and an early marriage.

Never put off until tomorrow what you can do today -- for tomorrow's gonna be bad enough as it is.

Where I play, the greens always break toward the bar.

I have never been drunk but I've often been overserved.

Change is fearful, but at the end it is beautiful.

Love has no meaning without understanding

For wit and judgment often are at strife, Though meant each other's aid, like man and wife.

I took six months off, finished high school, and hung out with friends.

Law is the safest helmet.

Everyone's afraid of everybody else...maybe because we're all afraid of ourselves.

He that tells a secret is anothers servant. [He that tells a secret is another's servant.]

I think the most important thing in skiing is you have to be having fun. If you're having fun, then everything else will come easy to you.

A gentleman doesn't pounce he glides. If a woman sits on a piece of furniture which permits your sitting beside her, you are free to regard this as an invitation, though not an unequivocal one.

It’s never too late to start eating well. A good diet can reverse many of those conditions as well. In short: change the way you eat and you can transform your health for the better.