I've never not finished a masturbatory session or a pizza. Those are the two things I've never left behind.

Of course on air I use occasional hyperbole to tell a story.

You don't cruise the Internet looking for your name and walk away with a good feeling. So, I never do it.

If you want to have a good life, you should focus on your family, on your business, on your dog, on your fun, and you'll have a good life.

Don’t do your best, do my best.

I feel like I'm a time traveler from the future who has been sent back to be annoyed.

Asking someone in advance not judge you, is like asking someone in advance not to smell you.

No one is depressed when they're being chased by a bear.

I like the freedom of podcasting. With podcasting you can really mess around with the form and the format. You can do as much time as you like without having to pause for commercials.

You shouldn't be eating anything that takes six minutes to microwave.

If the media isnt slanted toward the Left, why is everyone so worried about my affiliation with Glenn Beck but not with Alec Baldwin?

We were created for something higher than ourself.

The first sentence of every novel should be: Trust me, this will take time but there is order here, very faint, very human.

Communication leads to community, that is, to understanding, intimacy and mutual valuing.

The crossroads of science and politics is a dodgy place.

It's crucial we know the facts and science, but it's naïve to rely on them alone to build a movement for change.

Meeting your soulmate has a certain amount of meant-to-be-ness to it, AND it requires a big dose of make-it-happen-ness.

To make a documentary is one thing, to make a feature film is quite another.

So it was scary, but that's how it goes. To my great delight, I discovered that it did all belong.

If you are persistent, you will succeed

Say nothing of the new life you have begun or of the experiment you are making and experiences you expect to have. All this is a matter between God and you, and only between you two.