I was not a cool kid. There was no reason for me to be marginalised. I was just a nerd. I was kind of weird, and I found solace in video games.

I approximated the Black Friday experience at home by hurling myself into a wall a number of times and then ordering online.

We only hear success stories. You don't hear about the hundreds and hundreds - the overwhelming majority that don't go anywhere. This is a more realistic portrayal of what happens in startups.

The plan was always to come to America, because Pakistan's a scary place. They don't have religious freedom. It's very poor, and there's a lot of violence and corruption.

Just because you saw a vampire doesn't mean that a snowman or a Loch Ness Monster also exists.

I think being funny had something to do with feeling like an outsider, not feeling cool - insecurity.

The whole religion of Islam is based on reward and punishment and reward and punishment, and it becomes a part of how you think of everything. Even yourself.

I thought of America as this crazy, happy, exciting place where everybody's rich and there's stuff everywhere. Compared to Pakistan, it's not untrue.

I was extremely shy and had a terrible fear of public speaking. But I had fallen in love with stand-up.

I am a very nerdy guy. I understand that it's easier to cast me as a nerdy guy than an action star - although I would love to be an action star!

It's not like I listened to music and then stopped. I still don't have a real appreciation for music because I didn't really start listening to it until my 20s.

Reconnect with nature and be restored.

Now I no longer wish to be loved, beautiful, happy or successful. I want one thing and one thing only - to be left alone.

Dogs have hair. Cats, fur.Dogs whine, yip, howl, bark. Cats purrr.I say: No contest.

The self-righteous scream judgments against others to hide the noise of skeletons dancing in their own closets.

I mean, I'm the tag of the [ Big Bang Theory ] show! That was one of the easiest jobs I've ever had.

We are called with a special calling, and we have a special mission to perform.

I have a soft spot for musicians. If a man could ride this roller coaster with me and come out alive, then I guess we'd deserve each other's company.

This book is dedicated to all of my friends who helped me get to where I am today - you know who you are... and when I find you I am going to kill you.

I feel like there's no need to put on a heel that's too high. There's nothing cute about wobbling. There's nothing cute about not wanting to dance or walk somewhere because you're in pain.

I'd love to do sitcoms. I think I'm pretty darn funny.