I was watching MTV and there were girls dancing in suspended cages. That would be an ambivalent situation: "I'm trapped! ...but enjoying the music".

I bought a cactus. A week later it died. And I got depressed, because I thought, Damn. I am less nurturing than a desert.

How fast does a zebra have to run before it looks gray.

I wear dark sunglasses when I want my head to look more like a limousine.

The clothes make the man. The children working in sweatshops make the clothes. Therefore, the children working in sweatshops make the man.

A lot of people like lollipops. I don't like lollipops. To me, a lollipop is hard candy plus garbage. I don't need a handle. Just give me the candy.

Earrings are the same as sneezes: Two is okay, but ten in a row is annoying. If you have two then, God bless you.

The worst time to have a heart attack is during a game of charades.

The digital camera is a great invention because it allows us to reminisce. Instantly.

A drunk driver is very dangerous. So is a drunk backseat driver if he's persuasive.

When you have a fat friend there are no see-saws, only catapults.

Be yourself there is no one better

Love is like a pair of polarized sunglasses, making every color seem more vivid, richer, warmer. Without it we stare at the world dull-eyed and flinch at the thought it might remain the same forever.

With Nectar in your Mind instead of Thinking, you have Understanding band Wisdom

i thank the universe for takingeverything it has takenand giving to meeverything it is giving-balance

I'm always making Butcher Holler sound like the most backward part of the United States-and I think maybe it is.

The biggest fight in my life is not in boxing. The biggest fight in my life is how to end poverty in my country.

[Formula One racing looking after Jackie Stewart in 1968] was not so intense and, yes, it was much more dangerous - what was definitely different back then was the level of safety.

I never want to lead a team that is not allowed the freedom to pursue what's in their hearts. If you want your team to be fully committed, then you'd better be fully committed

The secret of creating anything new in your life consists of creating new commitments and then holding the tiller to your new course until it becomes established as a behavior.

I quit smoking cigarettes and with the $70 a month I am saving not smoking cigarettes I'm smoking $700 worth of cigars.