I will never shave off my beard and moustache. I did once, for charity, but my wife said, 'Good grief, how awful, you look like an American car with all the chrome removed.'

If it's free put me down for two please

If you turn a smiling face on the world, you've got a chance of finishing up a good-looking old person.

When I draw my caricature self-portrait, I always do a huge smile.

The only things you can ever truly own cannot be bought with money.

James Brown and Frank Sinatra are two different quantities in the universe. They represent two different experiences of the world.

Well, I get excited about music.

Christina Aguilera finally announced her pregnancy. Thanks for waiting until your third trimester to get the word out—why not just wait until you’re crowning?

I don't think writers are any smarter than other people. I think they may be more compelling in their stupidity, or in their confusion.

Gretchen shrugged. "After seeing how he acted when she almost died, I'm starting to get why she's with him." Then her voice hardened. "And really, Leila. That's twice now.

the poet like an acrobat climbs on rime to a high wire of his own making.

Democrats—lily-livered, weasel-assed collaborators.

And sometimes I think there isn’t anything to us but our mistakes.

Tim Price is one of the real ones ! A good friend and a great player !